random thoughts

last night, as i lay on my bed, random thoughts from events and speeches over the past few days fleeted into my mind. "it feels wrong not to have a crush." this line from a friend particularly struck me. so, what's so great about crushes?

in school and without, it is easy to find people talking about their crushes and relationships - after all, most students have just entered into a co-ed environment the stark difference between the two experiences have just begun to dawn on us. crushes, infatuation, and even love, are all part of an exciting trend that can be easily coined as 'relationships'.

and this trend is rampant and widespread. its 'overwhelming effects' have led to more and more people wanting to try and get themselves involved in it. yet, unknowingly, many of these people lost a part of them when they try to soak themselves in the saturated sea of want and attention - they have willingly drowned themselves. they forgot how it was like to be carefree and happy with life, to not care about boys and girls, about what others might say about you, and simply lead life to its fullest. perhaps, words are more easily expressed as in actions, but still, it's not that difficult once you've gained acceptance - accepting the fact that life still goes on, and things will eventually work out - and a comfortable place to be yourself.

relationship issues are always complicated - there's no absolute guide to it. everyone is different in their own ways, and every step you take with your 'significant other' is a step towards learning more about the relationship. crushes are really just obsessive infatuation with a person - and there's nothing great about it. it causes you to enter into a state where you are always looking out for her (in a guy's perspective) wherever you may go, and that a smile from her could simply brighten up your day. talking to her, you may find yourself the happiest man on earth at the moment, and that nothing could be better than that.

however, when she's away, you become a shell of what you are - empty and desolate. perhaps life is not as interesting as it should be. tendrils of doubts begun to creep into your mind as you review events of the two of you together. perhaps she's interested in someone else, you may think. to keep it short, crushes and infatuation, contrary to popular belief, is more detrimental than good. how can it be good when your state of happiness is dependent on just one person all the time? how can it be nice when you can't be yourself anymore? does it really feel good to have your emotions constantly in a roller coaster mode?

well, i leave these questions to you to answer. lol, that's a lot of heavy stuff i have just written i guess. hm.. of course, i have had my crushes before. in primary school where it was a mixed school.. in secondary school when i go for external camps or overseas trips.. and in jc. however, time eventually stole them away from my mind and returned me my sense of rationality. unless something is done to address your infatuation, it will eventually die off..

personally, i think that a steadily progression in relationship from friend to close friend to intimate friend is really a much better choice than a shotgun relationship, which will most probably than not fail. haha, that's where my random train of thoughts end i guess.. so to answer my friend's question, it's really nothing wrong to not have a crush - but it's something wrong if you want to crush another person. (no puns intended) lol.