good rest

At bottom, most of the things we strive for – security, success, wealth, status, power, recognition, validation, praise – are ways of trying to fill a gaping hole within us, a hole formed out of our separation from love. As ways of trying to win love indirectly, these substitute gratifications do not truly nourish us, because they do not deliver the real thing. In that sense, they are like junk food. Their failure to truly nourish only intensifies our inner hunger, driving us to run all the harder on the hamster wheel of success, desperate hoping to win some reward that will truly satisfy.

i slept from 930pm to 830am! nice and refreshing. it's been a while since i last had such a satisfying rest. =)

yesterday was spent pw-ing and trying to complete some maths. productivity was low. nvm, i must make it up today. anyway, designing the pw website with such limited resources was definitely frustrating. but finally, it is complete!


everyone is caught up in the studying fever now. it's as though the colourful canvas of life has been tinged with grey. this period before the promos seems like a limbo, where everyone feels confined and peeople act to make others conform to this confinement too, subjecting our lives to a never-ending cycle - that is, until the promos end.

as for myself, i guess i better follow the trend this time. suffer confinement for 20 days. and after that, it's all fun and games! open house and orientation are coming up soon! not to forget, the many welfare projects that will be planned and implemented! mmm. but then again, one shouldn't dream too far ahead..

i remember i came up with some weird theory before.

the theory of dreams and examinations.

it's always right before exams when we dream up so many fantasies of great fun and joy, hoping that this brief tenure in dreamland will give us the respite we need from excessive studying.

and yet, somehow, once the exams are over, we suffer from an empty feeling, a vacuum-like feeling that resides in us, bringing us discomfort for a while. i guess it's because these dreams that were designed as a form of release had its foundations built upon the exams.

as such, and once the exams are over, these once-wistful plans of ours seem to lose their meaning, leaving the pent up excitement and anticipation to dissipate into oblivion.

makes sense? i hope so.