loss

everyone has a lot to say. it only depends whether he has found the right person to speak to.

have you ever experienced losing something you treasure a lot? and i'm not speaking of material possessions. definitely, if we invest feelings and sentiments into a physical object, and fate decreeds that the item will be not be found, then most probably we will also feel the void created by the loss of the item gnawing at us, making us feel sad and lost, not knowing what we can do to retrieve it back.

so if such tangible things can wreck such havoc upon us, it will only make sense that when we lose the intangible, the pain, grief, and sense of loss will most certainly be amplified, magnified to greater proportions, perhaps so much that we feel we're suffocating under it, unable to handle the stress that causes fractures on our hearts.

we lose things all the time because we are forgetful and absent-minded. we forget the value we have once imposed upon these entities, and no longer treasure them as much. sometimes, they even fade into oblivion. and when we find them again, it only takes a short while before we become careless and lose them again.

do you know how the word 'careless' came about? well, it can be derived from the two words 'care' and 'less'. being 'careless' means caring less. and so we stopped caring, or care less, and the articles we once enshrined in all its resplendent glory no longer seem as beautiful, as bright, or as important.

how can i ever express the abject sense of sadness that overwhelmed me yesterday?
how can i ever show you the space in my heart that you once filled, the space that reverberates in its empty hollow now?

i can't.

sometimes, i really hate this awareness that age has carelessly thrown upon us. it's like telling a puppy that his job is to become a fierce and fear-inspiring watchdog immediately. ignorance is bliss.

alas, it's no use crying over spilled milk. it's time to pick up the shattered pieces of yesterday and build a castle of hope for tomorrow. after all, to love means loving the unlovable; to forgive means forgiving the unforgivable; and to hope is to continue hoping when all else seems hopeless.

i wonder, if sometimes letting oneself be too open, or allowing oneself to give too much, is detrimental to oneself, for it only allows one to be more easily hurt by the ones you have let in.

but doing that means living a dulled existence.
and life is colourful! life is beautiful!

and so i believe.
thus i continue.

our similarities only accentuate our differences.